Tuesday, July 29, 2014
When a person deliberately hides his or her intention, is this an ungodly action to take?
Let's say Person A likes Person B, and he wishes to get closer to her, to understand her better, and if compatible down in the long run, after a season of interaction, communication, and understanding of her character, to get together in a relationship. What happens to his intention of liking her. Surely Person A, liking Person B, would think of her differently, and would be looking forward to interacting with her. And this is where deliberate concealment comes into place. No matter what, Person A has to hide his inner feelings for Person B, and this hiding of feelings, coupled with a bias for actions to favour interaction, would surely mean deceit, and truly, this would be ungodly.
Proverbs 16:7 tells us that "When a man's ways please the Lord, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him." Indeed, the pinnacle of what we should strive for, are actions that please the Lord. Our behaviour must be wholly consistent with what God allows for in His Word, and surely deceit would not be consistent with the Word.
However, I see no way past this dilemma. Person A cannot just sit there and do nothing and wait for Person B to magically show interest in him, and then start a mutual relationship following this romantic interest. This simply does not make sense either. We see and know that relationships are nurtured and built upon with understanding, kindness, and familial affection. We are to trust our neighbours and friends, and show them kindness instead of enmity, as Proverbs 3:29-30 teaches us. "Devise not evil against thy neighbour, seeing he dwelleth securely by thee. Strive not with a man without cause, if he have done thee no harm." It makes no physical sense that without a friendship to start with, how can anyone ever end up in a relationship. How then, does Person A build a trusted, close friendship with Person B, before he pursues a relationship with her?
The Book of Ruth shows us instances of concealment of intention. Ruth was a widow, but dutiful and loyal to her mother-in-law Naomi. Both of them, having lost their husbands and in a very dark plight and lowly in status, were in trouble. Ruth dutifully took to the fields (Boaz's field) to harvest and help Naomi. And as time passed, Naomi instructed Ruth to go into Boaz house and lay at his feet. Certainly, the intentions of Naomi were deliberate in wanting Boaz to improve his affections to Ruth. And this deliberate action by Ruth, who would certainly know the commandments, would know that it was not necessarily a godly action, as she was essentially 'playing with fire' by laying so close to Boaz. However, Ruth behaved with civility and humbleness. Her actions were pure, and done only after consideration that she would be civil, and with the knowledge that Boaz was a God-fearing man.
Perhaps, the difference lies in the civility of action. I previously mentioned that it is nigh impossible to get into a relationship with someone without knowing each other well enough first. Without the foundation, how can you build a proper house? So yes, while the intention is concealed, ultimately, the actions should be pure. Person A should be sincere and pure in his actions in learning and understanding more about Person B. He should be God-fearing, always checking if his actions would please the Lord. He should always pray for God's guidance and instruction, and not jump ahead, or be impatient. He should, as much as possible, after prayerful meditation on the issue, try to treat Person B as he would treat a friend, or a close, special friend. If the Lord be willing, He would surely lead the way, and ordain a godly relationship with Person B in time to come. This certainly is no easy task for Person A to undertake, but with God, nothing shall be impossible. "If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you." (Matthew 17:20) All we need is to have faith in the Lord, and "seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." (Matthew 6:33)
Place the Lord first, and cast all worries to Him, behaving and acting in a matter which will please Him, and He will provide. Amen. || posted by Kuan Hui
Let's say Person A likes Person B, and he wishes to get closer to her, to understand her better, and if compatible down in the long run, after a season of interaction, communication, and understanding of her character, to get together in a relationship. What happens to his intention of liking her. Surely Person A, liking Person B, would think of her differently, and would be looking forward to interacting with her. And this is where deliberate concealment comes into place. No matter what, Person A has to hide his inner feelings for Person B, and this hiding of feelings, coupled with a bias for actions to favour interaction, would surely mean deceit, and truly, this would be ungodly.
Proverbs 16:7 tells us that "When a man's ways please the Lord, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him." Indeed, the pinnacle of what we should strive for, are actions that please the Lord. Our behaviour must be wholly consistent with what God allows for in His Word, and surely deceit would not be consistent with the Word.
However, I see no way past this dilemma. Person A cannot just sit there and do nothing and wait for Person B to magically show interest in him, and then start a mutual relationship following this romantic interest. This simply does not make sense either. We see and know that relationships are nurtured and built upon with understanding, kindness, and familial affection. We are to trust our neighbours and friends, and show them kindness instead of enmity, as Proverbs 3:29-30 teaches us. "Devise not evil against thy neighbour, seeing he dwelleth securely by thee. Strive not with a man without cause, if he have done thee no harm." It makes no physical sense that without a friendship to start with, how can anyone ever end up in a relationship. How then, does Person A build a trusted, close friendship with Person B, before he pursues a relationship with her?
The Book of Ruth shows us instances of concealment of intention. Ruth was a widow, but dutiful and loyal to her mother-in-law Naomi. Both of them, having lost their husbands and in a very dark plight and lowly in status, were in trouble. Ruth dutifully took to the fields (Boaz's field) to harvest and help Naomi. And as time passed, Naomi instructed Ruth to go into Boaz house and lay at his feet. Certainly, the intentions of Naomi were deliberate in wanting Boaz to improve his affections to Ruth. And this deliberate action by Ruth, who would certainly know the commandments, would know that it was not necessarily a godly action, as she was essentially 'playing with fire' by laying so close to Boaz. However, Ruth behaved with civility and humbleness. Her actions were pure, and done only after consideration that she would be civil, and with the knowledge that Boaz was a God-fearing man.
Perhaps, the difference lies in the civility of action. I previously mentioned that it is nigh impossible to get into a relationship with someone without knowing each other well enough first. Without the foundation, how can you build a proper house? So yes, while the intention is concealed, ultimately, the actions should be pure. Person A should be sincere and pure in his actions in learning and understanding more about Person B. He should be God-fearing, always checking if his actions would please the Lord. He should always pray for God's guidance and instruction, and not jump ahead, or be impatient. He should, as much as possible, after prayerful meditation on the issue, try to treat Person B as he would treat a friend, or a close, special friend. If the Lord be willing, He would surely lead the way, and ordain a godly relationship with Person B in time to come. This certainly is no easy task for Person A to undertake, but with God, nothing shall be impossible. "If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you." (Matthew 17:20) All we need is to have faith in the Lord, and "seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." (Matthew 6:33)
Place the Lord first, and cast all worries to Him, behaving and acting in a matter which will please Him, and He will provide. Amen. || posted by Kuan Hui
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